Holding on to the past is something that a lot of us will do unconsciously. We’ll keep thinking about how things were, we’ll reject changes whenever they’re proposed, and we might let it get to us so much that it starts to negatively affect our lifestyle and wellbeing. Whether it’s breaking up with your partner, losing a loved one, or even recovering from a frustrating situation at work, it’s important to learn how you can move on and let go of the past.
It’s wrong to think of it as “letting go”
While this heading might counter the title of this blog post, it’s important to understand the underlying message behind letting go. For example, if you were to lose a loved one and someone told you to “let go of the past”, then you’d probably get pretty upset or even angry. Nobody wants to “let go” of their loved ones because it almost implies that you should just forget about them and move on with your life. That’s really no way to honour the memory of a loved one and it can be considered rude.
The proper way to think about this is that you’re not letting go of the memories of your loved ones in this situation. But rather, you’re letting go of the bad feelings, the negativity, and the sadness. There are many ways to do this, and it’s important that you learn to filter the sadness and the happiness that you might experience.
For instance, cremation pendants can be a great way to help you remember your loved ones and think back to all of the positive things you’ve experienced together. This can be tied in with sadness, but those feelings are the ones that we should be trying to get rid of and say goodbye to. It’s difficult to associate all of your memories with just positive feelings, but it’s something that we should be actively working towards.
In short; you’re not letting go of the memory of a loved one or the positive experiences you may have had with people. Instead, you’re letting go of the negativity attached to those experiences so that only the happy thoughts are left behind.
Understand when it’s starting to affect your own wellbeing
Dealing with the loss of a loved one isn’t the only situation where it might be difficult to move on. Another great example of this is breaking up with a friend or partner. Usually, there are many negative emotions that will prevent you from living a happier life. You might be thinking about all the negative things that have been said, you might be curious about what they’re doing, and you might be carrying some painful thoughts that are difficult to overcome.
These kinds of situations are difficult to cope with. However, something that makes it a lot easier to manage is being able to speak to friends and family members that you trust. Some people find that it’s much easier to cope with difficult situations if they have someone to speak to, but it’s important not to use them as a way to rant about something all the time because that makes the negative emotions stick to your mind.
A better way to overcome this is to focus on yourself. Look after your health, practise mindfulness, and try to focus on your own personal goals and work. This can help distract you from those negative feelings and also encourages you to move on with your life and remember your goals and what you want to achieve in life.
If you bottle up these emotions all the time then it’s just going to get harder and harder to let go. You’ll find that little things will constantly remind you of those negative experiences, and it can even get to a point where you’ll feel anxious, upset, or even depressed about the situation. While it’s important to let those negative emotions flow now and then, you ultimately need to worry about your own wellbeing and engage in self-care to really look after yourself.
Positivity is the key to moving on
Being positive is the key when it comes to moving on from these difficult situations. Make sure you surround yourself with people and activities that make you happy and learn to overcome those difficult situations by focusing on yourself. Talk about it when it helps, but otherwise, make it a habit to focus on the things that you truly find important so you can move on.
This post is in collaboration, however all opinions are my own.