No relationship is perfect, it takes work every single day. You are going to learn so much about each other, there will be times when you don’t see eye to eye on things and times where your both so in sync that you can get through absolutely anything. I am currently in a 4 year relationship and I have learnt so much.
Communication is key
You need to communicate with your partner, If you both work long hours and hardly see each other during the week, make the time for each other in the evenings or the mornings. Try work around each others schedule and if you both put the effort in it will work.
There will also be times when you can’t stand each other after an argument or you just aren’t happy about something, communication is so important at this point. Tell your partner how you are feeling and open up to each other. You cant resolve a problem if you don’t tell each other how you are both feeling.
It is also important to communicate with each other when you are happy, for instance if you are watching your favourite show together just lean over and say I love doing this or I wouldn’t want to be any where else right now or the ‘I love you’. It makes that other person feel appreciated and warm inside. It’s important to pay attention to each other, pay compliments and lift each other up. Remember you have chosen to give your whole life to this one person so you need to make each other feel special.
The little things
The little things matter so much, when you do the weekly shop just think to yourself whats his/hers favourite chocolate or favourite drink. Grab it for them, little things like that go such a long way. My partner is amazing for this because he is always usually out at work and has the time to nip in and pick things up. He will pick me up some M&M’s because he knows I love them or my favourite drink. Especially since being pregnant he likes to surprise me and looks after me.
Other small things, if your favourite song comes on that you have together send a little text saying listening to our favourite song or even just a little voice note saying I love you. You don’t have to shower your partner in gifts and affection but it is important to do the little things. These are things that will make that other person feel special.
Don’t take each other for granted
After a year or two you have come out of the honey moon period and you are most probably living together maybe have kids. Sometimes you can start to take each other for granted by not spending time together, not going out on dates, not bothering with Birthday/Christmas cards and not keeping things alive.
Couples can fall in to this trap where they start to fizzle out because they think they are bored of each other and don’t do anything. If your not careful you can get to comfortable and start treating each other differently. So take a moment and suggest a movie night or something cute and special it doesn’t mean you have to spend money you can do it in the comfort of your own home.
Never go to bed on an argument
Me and my partner are so guilty of this, we use to go to sleep on an argument and when we both woke up we would regret it. Time is precious, life is precious and your relationship is precious. Try not to fall asleep on an argument its not nice to wake up to if its still going on and it can make you have horrible nightmares!
Always discuss not argue
Try to discuss the problems you guys have rather than arguing, I know we can get so angry and have the urge to shout at our partners but we sometimes end up getting so worked up that we say things that we don’t mean which can damage a relationship. Its easier said than done but the best way to resolve problems is to discuss things rather than scream it.
Honesty is key in a relationship, you want to trust your partner to the moon and back and for them to trust you to. Now this can be difficult if you have trust issues or have had difficult relationships in the past. Be honest with each other, thats one of our strongest things about mine and Liam’s relationship. We are so honest with each other, we don’t keep a single thing from one another.
Like I said before its important to show affection to your partner, keep the romance alive. If you do these things you can keep the honey moon phase going forever. Just make a little effort and cook a romantic dinner or go to the movies. Kiss one another good night and good morning, I know it can be difficult with kids and busy lives.
If you have children or family living with you, take some quality time together. Maybe go for a walk, sign up to the gym together, watch a movie. These small little times spent together work wonders for a relationship. Always make time for your partner, no matter how busy you may be.
Never compare your relationship to a celebrity’s or a friend. You don’t know what goes on behind closed doors. You don’t know how long they have been together. I have learnt so much growing up, the relationships that I thought would have been stuck together for life have actually ended including my parents. Its shocking how people assume that other peoples lives are perfect, there not. Everyone has different ways of dealing with things.
Listen to your partner
I see my job is to be there for my partner through good times and bad. If they have a little cry or a little self doubt moment be the person who picks them up. Thats what its all about in this life is having someone that is your rock. If they just want to talk, listen to them. Listening to your partner is very important in a relationship. My motto is ‘ treat people how you would like to be treated’.
I hope you guys enjoyed this post, until next time Xo